I am starting this a little late in my surrogacy pregnancy. But lets start with my back ground. I am 31 y/o married and have 3 beautiful children whom I adore! I started my very first surrogacy journey with a dear friend of mine who could no longer have children of her own, but being remarried wanted to have a child with her new husband. I myself, love being pregnant and am pretty good at it (not to brag). So, this was not even a hard choice, in fact I don't think I even took 5 minutes to think it over. She loved him, I loved her, and I wanted them to have this extra little ingredient to their already perfect recipe. You could say the cherry on top of their already 3 awesome kids! He was born in January of 2013 and is a huge blessing to them and I love that I was able to help them to achieve this happiness.
I knew before I was even pregnant with him that this was something I wanted to do again but this time for a stranger. Helping a friend have a baby was easy, almost like I didn't deserve all the awe I was receiving from everyone. I felt like it was just something I should do as a friend, it was a given? At least that's how it felt.
So once he was born I started loosing weight to get down to the ideal BMI for surrogacy. I found a great agency online and applied to be a surrogate. The process was slightly tedious, they wanted my whole life story, family background, sexual history, my husbands history, and a psychological test. WOW that's a lot to get through, but it will all be worth it, right? Next came the couples profile. First a couple from France who seemed perfect, but didn't think I was perfect. Then my IP's (intended parents) I received their profile and thought they seem great, but they are gay. What will everyone think about me if I help a gay couple become parents? I personally have nothing against gays. In my opinion everyone should live their lives as they wish with whom they wish. Love is love. The next problem, they're not married. Again who am I to judge? I had 2 children before I got married. They were by accident, people don't just decide to spent hundreds and thousands of dollars to have a baby together if they aren't 100% certain of their future together, so...we meet by Skype. I am not very good with conversations so it was slightly awkward at first, but we talked and got to know each other and it was great, they were perfect. They were so excited to be on this journey and excited about me being their surrogate and I was excited to get the process started with them. They already had one surrogate fall through for medical reasons so they were a little shy about the process with me.
(By the way they live in Sweden, so all this is being done over Skype and email.)
Next stop, medical screening. My husband and I both have to be tested to make sure we don't have any communicable diseases and what not so that means a plane ride to the north east. Neither of us had ever flown before so this was an adventure for us. All the testing turned out great so then I started the meds for the embryo transfer. I guess I'm not really getting into how all this made me feel. Well I felt great I just couldn't wait for the process to get started I was excited more than worried. The hormones weren't that bad really (my husband might say different if you were to ask him). Transfer day couldn't get here fast enough for me and that also meant another flight, but this time we were gonna take a side trip to New York City. One of my dreams has always been to see NYC so there was no question we would go at least for a day. So the day before the transfer we went early to the DR's had our testing done then headed to the city. It was amazing, being from Kansas and being able to see for miles it was crazy how cluttered and tall everything was. As neat as it all was, I wouldn't trade Kansas for anything!
So the next day, it was transfer day! We went to the office, got all ready and went into the room for the transfer. My IP's living in Sweden posed a slight problem for them in that it is a long flight for a 5 minute procedure so Skype was our friend on this day! They got to see the whole procedure and we go to chat for a while after. The procedure itself was fairly painless. A little pinch here, a "funny" feeling there, and done. Really you just put 2 little "babies" in me? That's crazy! Now for 3 days of bedrest and a flight back home. Thank goodness I think the worst part was being away from my kids I missed them and felt bad to take time away from them, but again, it will all be worth it!
Almost immediately there was cramping, most likely from the procedure, and minuscule amount of bleeding, again, probably from the procedure. Then, when I get home nausea, cramping, headaches, I'm pregnant? I have to be these are all my normal pregnancy symptoms minus the breast pain yay, it worked. but we have to wait to know for sure. Then I start reading online that the progesterone that I'm still taking can cause all the same symptoms of pregnancy and I become unsure. Again it's all about waiting......2 week wait is what it's referred to, anyone who has ever had infertility treatments knows it's the worst. Then 1 week after the transfer my lab makes an error and draws an HCG which turns up negative. I'm not pregnant.....now what? It was supposed to be easy, I've been pregnant 4 times before, this sucks!! And what a disappointment I am to the guys!
Was it something I did? When do we try again? I don't want to have to fly again or leave my kids again and my husband doesn't have anymore days vacation, who was gonna go with me?
None the less, it all worked out. My sister went with me and my kids survived. I think it helped that dad was with them. So we spent another day in NYC my sister also had never flown before or seen NYC so she was very excited for the opportunity. Then there was transfer number 2 another 2 embryos transferred with my IP's viewing from the corner via Skype and another 3 days bed rest. But, another week later lab error HCG draw and......we have pregnancy! Yay, I'm not a failure. I was so worried! Those were the last embryo's they had, I was so excited and the level was crazy high for only 1 week out, is it twins?
Another week went by and another crazy high number, oh no is it twins? Another week and another ridiculously high number, and six week sono day.......TWINS!!! The guys were there on Skype they were shocked to say the least and so was I but also, excited. I always wondered what twins were like and now I would get to experience it without having to take them home after and actually raise them. Although, that might have been fun too when I was having my own children, hard but fun! Now it's like any other pregnancy.
I am a nurse in labor and delivery, so I get daily questions about how the pregnancy is going and how I'm feeling which is fine. I love that I have so much support at home and at work and of coarse from the guys! We email almost daily and Skype when we can. Its a 7 hour time difference so it can be difficult sometimes to Skype.
We had our anatomy sono done a few weeks ago and one of the IP's (we'll call him J) came to visit so he could see the sono. Wow what a great guy! He was so fun to have around and so kind. My children loved having him here and getting to learn about the different culture was awesome! Oh and he brought candy and chocolate with him! Who doesn't love a guy who brings chocolate? I love that our futures are forever tied together in a good way. Anyways we had the sono and J was there with S on Skype when we found out that there are 2 little boys growing and healthy in my belly! They were again shocked. They already have one boy at home so to think of 3 boys was slightly overwhelming to them, I don't blame them! Now though, they are getting used to the idea, I think. It's been 3 weeks since that sono and these little guys are rambunctious! always moving and twisting..there was one just as I spoke of it!
I think we are all caught up now? feel free to comment questions if you'd like!!
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